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How to deal with heartbreak, the holistic way....

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by debdobbs, Oct 21, 2012.

  1. debdobbs

    debdobbs New Member

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    I am a complementary therapist, I have just discovered my husband of 22 years has been having an affair for the last 4 years with a work colleague. I need to cleanse any negative energy in house now as he had left. I am also getting reiki on Thursday as well as doing my reiki 2 course on Sunday. How have other people dealt with this kind of issue, be interesting to hear.x
     
  2. meadowsweet

    meadowsweet Member

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    I think the holistic approach would be to accept the emotions you are feeling, let them flow and release them, don't bottle them up. Be gentle with yourself. You are allowed to cry and to get mad. It takes time to heal from such shocks to the system.

    Look into the Bach remedies and try those, I'm not a Bach practitioner but have chosen good remedies for my husband before that really work. Reiki is a good therapy to have and a daily self-healing will certainly help.

    Stand up for yourself, he is the one who walked away and betrayed you, so you owe him nothing. Remember you are strong and confident, you will get through this even if it will get tough. Stay positive, the heartache and hurt is only temporary, one door is closing and a new one will open.

    An ex of mine betrayed me and then left, he was awkward and the split wasn't amicable, but little me got through it and I scared him as how resilient and strong I could be. He thought I would crumple and give him everything he wanted, he was very wrong. lol... I'm a gentle soul and until I had to go through it I would never have thought I could survive but I did and I'm a much happier person without him and it led the way for me to meet my now husband.

    Love and Light to you. You are in my thoughts.

    x
     
  3. ravenstar

    ravenstar New Member

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    Sending you healing energy debdobbs :grouphug: I couldn't agree more with meadowsweet :) Don't leave alot of emotional debris under the rug so to speak. Heal your inner hurts, write them out, share them with others and forgive yourself and him/others. This takes time...don't force it...it will gain force and momentum on its own. Forgiveness doesn't mean you've 'turned the other cheek', it just means you've let go of the emotion but 'kept the lesson'.

    If you want to cleanse your home, you could use a sage stick...especially concentrate it in the windows, corners and doorways. This is where negativity tends to sit. And you're doing your Reiki II, :) both the power symbol and cleansing symbol are excellent for dispelling negativity.

    In Bach flowers, Star of Bethlehem helps to heal trauma and 'shock'; :)
     
  4. debdobbs

    debdobbs New Member

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    Thank you meadowsweet and Ravenstar. I am staying strong, funnily enough came down with a cold today, think its my body's way of telling me to rest and take it easy as I have been running around keeping myself busy. Will use a sage stick to cleanse the energy. I am a great believer in reiki and look forward to my attunement. I think I was worrying that all m emotions would come out after my attunement and I wouldn't be able to deal with them. He obviously wasn't a positive soul mate, do I look forward to the future. Much love.xx
     
  5. CarolineN

    CarolineN New Member

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    Hi Deb

    You have had some excellent advice. May I add another piece to the jigsaw of possible help? Have you looked at EFT (Emotional Freedom Tchnique)? I have had excellent results with clients who were heartbroken from break-up of their relationship - completely changing their perspective. EFT made this so easy to do. Certainly worth a try! You can find a practitioner here on HP or [DLMURL="http://www.aamet.org/search/search-aamet-members-test.html"]here[/DLMURL].

    Hope you feel lots better soon.
     
  6. StormJewel

    StormJewel New Member

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    Hi Deb

    So sorry to hear of your experience. There's some great advice in this thread already and hopefully more to come. I would echo the advice on using a sage smudging stick (or sage and copal would be good too)for purifying your house and yourself too (I actually offer these in my shop should you need to know where to get them, if you google my screenname StormJewel you'll find the shop!)

    Also you could try burning incense, such as rock copal.

    Have you ever tried Qi Gong? I find this very very helpful to do (always) but especially when I am feeling emotionally low. It's really quick to do as well (up to you how long but I get good effects from as quick as 5-10 mins including first relaxing and grounding myself, and taking a big deep breath while thinking of something like a natural scene.)

    Love and light to you!

    Louisa
     
  7. LifeIsLiving

    LifeIsLiving New Member

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    cleaning

    I clean other peoples energies every time someone new comes into my home. I have also done the same when my husband had an affair and left me.
    I go from room to room when cleaning and ask the Universe to completely clean out all unwanted energies and take it all into the ether where is can be dispersed. As already suggested. You can also use the Reiki symbols to help you by placing them particularly in the corners of each room.

    I have a visualisation technique whereby I imagine a fishing net sweeping from side to side getting rid of all the debris but leaving the good things behind. Then taken upwards into the great Ether.

    The most important thing is your own cleansing and that will take time.

    Be kind to yourself and take one step at a time

    Maria
     
  8. hom

    hom New Member

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    Hi, you could find a registered homeopath and have a few sessions. Many people think homeopathy is just for physical problems but not so. Apart from the therapeutic benefit of the consultation, the natural remedies will help to balance your emotions and support you during a difficult time. HTH Hom
     
  9. LifeIsLiving

    LifeIsLiving New Member

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    For a reason

    Some people are in our life for a short period or time or for life but either way they are always in our life is for a reason.:)
     
  10. Flowers

    Flowers Member

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    sorry for your exprience I have had such I have had such an exprience and all I can tell you is that you should not let that affect you life take courage and continue with your life
     
  11. Michael Price6

    Michael Price6 New Member

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    Hi debdobbs, sorry to hear your experiance. I think it is worth reading meadowsweets messsage a few times, as there is everything you need to know about your recovery. You need to give yourself time and I think you will be a better person. Take time to relax. and all the best for the future.
     
  12. happygirl

    happygirl New Member

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    Hi Debdobbs,

    I’m really sorry to hear what has happened. I think that some great advice has already been mentioned on here. I personally haven’t gone through this but I’ve had some really bad times and have been let down badly which has been upsetting to say the least.

    Personally I’ve used Bach remedies and homeopathy – some of which you can buy over the counter. I use arsen alb if I’m feeling anxious for example. I also use crystals – we all have our own favourite but I love baby pink mangano calcite which is softer than rose quartz and is a very loving stone (see description below):

    Mangano Calcite connects us with Divine Love and is a stone of the heart. It is excellent for emotional healing; it can help shift long standing issues and support those with deep grief or trauma. It can gently release buried anger or grief and can help prevent passive-aggressive behaviour.

    Other things like crystal therapy, meditation etc are good for letting go. I think Ravenstar’s words “Forgiveness doesn't mean you've 'turned the other cheek', it just means you've let go of the emotion but 'kept the lesson'” is very good. Many people think forgiveness is that you forget what has been done to you but for me it’s not. For me it’s about not wishing ill of the other person and not destroying your own wellbeing thinking about them but that doesn’t mean you have to condone what they’ve done or that you have to be friends with them.


    Cleansing the house is great and I know many people use sage. Perhaps giving the home a makeover may help (I’m not suggesting it needs it but something different may make it feel fresh so to speak) – some new décor (paint, crystals, pictures, ornaments whatever you want) may be a practical solution. Buy some more things that you really like – it may give the place a fresher feeling so to speak. Also if I’m upset I like visiting the countryside. Being close to nature soothes me somehow.

    Also a good thing is to write a list of things YOU want to do – whether it’s a list of places to visit, friends to see/visit, hobbies to take up etc. It’ll give you something to look forward to and aim for.

    Wishing you all the best.
     
  13. ceidauilyc

    ceidauilyc New Member

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    Sorry that you had to go through such a bad experience. Have you used a malachite or rose quartz to cleanse? I would suggest a clear quartz or selenite to the mix too. Get all those bad juju off you and start a new life.
     

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